December 8th 2008

Why the fuck would anyone want to become and accountant?

And also, why the fuck is life made so easy for fellow uni students? THEY GET EVERYTHING. Maybe I should go, and become an accountant.

This week has been strange. The amazing thing is that I'm in Fitzroy now, the best suburb in Melbourne, I remember going there with Simon and we fell in love! I was like. I have to live here one day. And Simon sayd he'd love to have a studio apartment thing decked out (or a factory thing) with all his whatchamacallits (I'm so naming my band that) and shit.

So yeah this weeks been real up and down, I was fucked as last week and had nowhere to go etcetc so I called my mum for help but that just ended up being an argument becasue she got angry that I came to Australia (wow I got here 9 months ago. Did you know that?) and she told me how shes spent all her money on gambling and I fucking hung up in tears with Ashley next to me experiencing everything so I called my Aunty and she gave me $200. Which saved my life. Kindof.

I got all the help from Ashley, Simon and these 3 other girls that Simon and Ash are mostly friends with, they helped me with a CV n shit and they reffered me to this meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeannnnn place in FITZROY. Which is basically like, the most easygoing place in the world, they told them about me and explained I didnt have much money and they were real happy to let me stay. It's basically a house, at the end of a rainbow. Its full of weed, colour, and cool people.. It's just a really good vibe. So im pretty happy to be there. And what else. Yeah so the others are still at All Nations but lately, especially this week its just been so awkward and really really upsetting becasue for one, im not even allowed at the hostel becaseu they kicked me out, fuckers, and because everyone is working and blah blah they all have money and they are always doing shit and Im kinda not in the position to hang out with them.. 99% of the time.

Me and Simon went to Die! Die! Die! last Friday which was spec. He loved it, I hadnt hung out with him properly in w little while and I missed him becasue I love him so much and we smoked weed in the alley while childrem collide were playing and it was cool cuz you could hear the music banging. And we chatted. for ages. mostly about how we cant contain how good a song ramble on is by Led Zeppelin. I've fuully come to the conclusion that he likes that song more than I becasue he has the best stories about when and where he listens to it. Which is beautiful.

Anyway. That night kinda ended badly because $75 of that $200 that I got, went on that one night when I needed it, and Ash specifically said to me that day dont fucking touch it. But I bought 2 beers. A hungry jacks. Then on the fucking bus home I was drifting off to sleep and waking up every now and then and I mustve missed my stop, well I DID because I ended up in fucking ELTHAM which is 45 MINS AWAY from the CBD and I was like to the gay bus driver where am I?! Are you going back 2 the city?! and he was like noooo im nottttt and it was deserted out there and i was stranded so i used the bus drivers phone to call Simon and I was crying telling him I didnt know where I was and I dont know what to do and then a taxi came and it cost me fifty fuckin bucks and I was absolutely gutted.

Me and Simon also argued before we left each other that night and I almost made him cry. Over how I cant help myself and its breaking his heart how I wont get my act together.

So yeah, its just been totally awkward hanging out with Ashen and Simon and the girls because all they go on about is stuff I'm not involved with and they all hang out everyday and Im in another world and it sucks. Yesterday, I went to visit them while I was out on a tangen sorting out Ashes birthday present (which is way cool) 4 his bday tomorrow, and I was like, by reception and the cunt manager tried to tell me to leave because Id been kicked out ooooooooooooooooooo and I was like, 'you know what, Im just here to see some friends, and I'm glad I left because this place is money driven and youve forgotten the whole concept about travelling and im sorry I ruined your 'product' by staying here 'ilegally' for on night' and then i called him a fucking retard. then i went outside, BECAUSE I WASNT ALLOWED IN and I was just standing there with Ruth and Simon when he came out and was like 'your not allowed in the bar either' and I just said 'its a shit bar and ive never been in it' all this because I stayed there for one fucking night without paying. fuck their faces!!!!! omg, where am i ever going to go out in melbourne now? i just CANT live without that shitty little backpacker bar.

fucckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk

so yeah, then we went on the tram to i dunno. then we got off, the girls went to the travel shop or some shit then i went with simon and ash to the park, well i nearly did, because ash didnt want me to come, because he said i should be busking because i have no money and he was bringing up all the stuff that has been fucking me over all week and then us 3 (us 3 havent hung out in what feel like weeks) and then we just all stood there talking/arguing and i was crying and i was just like fuck sake i miss you guys and they were going on about stuff and i was and they care about me and ash just wants to have a good birthday so i left them and went busking and made $2.10 and then i was like fuck this after half an hour and went back to my pad, had some goon then everyone came over and i went with them while they ate food and they were just going on about how good it was and it just wasnt affecting me whatsoever.. for the very first time and i just went outside while they ate for a ciggarette for like 5 minutes and then i looked up and someone had a bfm* bumper sticker on their window!!

*Bfm, the best radio station in Auckland. Not so commercial like every other bullshit radio station in Auckland (e.g ZM THE EDGE MORE FM MAI FM THE ROCK CLASSIC HITS), which makes it surprising to see a bfm sticker on the window.

A fucking bfm sticker in australia?? ..only in fitzroy. I'm gonna email them the picture I took of it with the subject header 'FEEL PRIVELEGED'

If it was a ZM sticker or any bullshit radio station from Auckland instead I would move to Spain.

VERDICT: Ash is 21 tomorrow and I have a really good present for him, Ash and Simon will be my friends no matter what happens.